I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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