She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Randomize