i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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