Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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