Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
