oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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