Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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