It's Friday. Sex?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
