doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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