just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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