Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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