What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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