I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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