There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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