She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
We need to get me chipped asap
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Pooping to opera.
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