btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
