What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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