Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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