You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
