i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
