What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
