I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize