I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
