i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize