Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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