At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower