Texts From Last Night

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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I sold my books for weed money!

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Finals don't start for a week...

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  (732): I sold my books for weed money! (302): Finals don't start for a week... http://tfl.nu/onx1
  Replies (19) Good night (4134) Bad night (2578)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.

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  (832): The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went. http://tfl.nu/fpvf
  Replies (16) Good night (6258) Bad night (1153)
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  (818): View more from California

  I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.

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  (818): I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos. http://tfl.nu/bkr9
  Replies (23) Good night (5298) Bad night (1375)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life

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  (708): i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life http://tfl.nu/nn4z
  Replies (32) Good night (1918) Bad night (5966)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.

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  (201): she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said. http://tfl.nu/ngdj
  Replies (9) Good night (632) Bad night (2936)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship

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  (808): I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship http://tfl.nu/z40t
  Replies (4) Good night (1501) Bad night (2070)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.

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  (850): Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either. http://tfl.nu/kaox
  Replies (1) Good night (1262) Bad night (1846)
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  (562): View more from California

  don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.

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  (562): don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you. http://tfl.nu/zbku
  Replies (3) Good night (2459) Bad night (576)
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  (714): View more from California

  My liver just had a heart attack.

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  (714): My liver just had a heart attack. http://tfl.nu/xspi
  Replies (9) Good night (1193) Bad night (577)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...

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  (864): Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right... http://tfl.nu/ms5r
  Replies (1) Good night (773) Bad night (465)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?

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  (832): I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal? http://tfl.nu/mk58
  Replies (7) Good night (1012) Bad night (429)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!

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  (321): I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis! http://tfl.nu/o0qu
  Replies (4) Good night (600) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.

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  (386): At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though. http://tfl.nu/1o31
  Replies (13) Good night (698) Bad night (287)
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  (408): View more from California

  I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary

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  (408): I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary http://tfl.nu/kxfy
  Replies (2) Good night (724) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.

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  (919): Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes. http://tfl.nu/z2vt
  Replies (0) Good night (599) Bad night (238)

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