so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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