Swine flu. Run for my life!
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
