once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
