it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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