So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize