May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize