sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
