hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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