After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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