What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
the liver wants what the liver wants
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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