it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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