I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
