Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize