but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize