Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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