people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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