i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize