Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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