I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
