I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize