My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
