my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
