please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Randomize
