found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize